6 – Beyond Personality there Is No Idea that What You Are can be ‘Wrong’ or ‘Better.’
In these blogs I am sharing what I know. I am not sharing what I do. (I don’t think you would be very interested in that!) There is of course nothing wrong with sharing what you do, but like any activity, if we look closely at the motivation behind it, we can learn a lot about Personality.
Many people use social media as a sort of notice board on which to demonstrate their success in living that ‘You Only Live Once’ philosophy. The message seems to be a composite of some, or all, of the following: ‘Look at this wonderful place I am in. See how many friends I have. Aren’t I living a fabulous life? See how much fun I am having.’
I’m not saying there’s anything wrong with having fun or ‘success’- that would be ridiculous. I’m simply pointing out the fact that these kinds of posts are often the projection of a life of fun, ‘success’ and ‘living in the moment.’ A way to gain attention and be distracted from depression, worry, self-esteem issues or whatever particular form one’s Suffering takes. The general idea of success in the world as seen in social media seems to be defined by: looking young, being constantly busy and having lots of money. This idea of success pretends to be about ‘living in the moment’, but is it? This moment doesn’t need an advertisement, it doesn’t need continually updating posts to prove it’s OK, to prove it’s a ‘fulfilled moment.’
This motivation to constantly prove you’re doing OK is an expression of Personality. We need to feel loved and accepted by the tribe out there on social media because we don’t love and accept ourselves. It’s just another form of the ‘gaining attention to feel OK’ strategy that we learned as young children. If we were really fulfilled and happy, we’d be sharing our Joy with whoever was around us, in that moment. There’d be no need to broadcast it to friends and strangers all over the world. So paradoxically these sort of posts actually highlight the fact that we’re not doing OK. What’s being presented is the image of fulfilment rather than fulfilment itself.
So what is fulfilment? Where does it come from? When the Personality falls away, one experiences the fulfilment of coming home to what we are and have always been. You could call this an ‘inner fulfilment’- it is not in any way dependant on what you do in the world or how others perceive you. Beyond Personality, there is no need for external validation. There is no idea that you can be ‘wrong’ or ‘better’. The experience of this Love is the only real fulfilment of the ‘present moment’. This is it.
More on this subject in The Story of ‘You’, Chapter 33 – Chasing Happiness.